The second you’ve done it, I know. A chill goes through me. You’ve actually done it! You’ve jumped!

You’ve been threatening to for ages… I just never thought you actually would.

I glance at Charlie, who’s acting as if everything’s normal.

Well, of course he is, you twat! He couldn’t feel if Matt died!

Were you really that depressed? Was I really that bad a boyfriend that you felt you had to take your own life?

Unable to stand it anymore, I get up and leave the house. I head to the bridge I know you’d use if you were to actually do what I know you have done.

I reach it and notice something tied to a barrier about halfway along the bridge. I move towards it, frightened by what I may find, hoping it’ll be a sign of hope for me.

It’s your shoe, tied to the railings by the laces. Oh, what’ve you done, Matt? I notice a slip of paper tucked into the shoe as it blows back and forth in the breeze.

My shaking hand reaches forward and takes the paper. I slowly unfold it:

Jay

I knew you’d come, but it’s too late. Don’t blame yourself. It wasn’t because of you. You’ve been fantastic! It was him though! He haunted my sleep and followed me during my waking hours. I kissed you and imagined him hurting you. This’ the only way I can be free! Never go to him, promise me that! But live your life, live it for yourself, and if that’s not enough. Live it for me.

Love you always

Matt

I stare at the note. Who’s ‘he’? The wind blows the paper out my hand and into the swirling mass of water below.

I look over; it doesn’t look to bad… My leg swings over the barrier, as if by its own accord. My other follows and I’m standing on the other side, staring down.

We can be together, Matt! All it requires is a tiny step… And I’m willing to take it for you.

I take the step and the water rushes up to greet me; it folds around me neatly as I hit it. I already feel weak. It’s a cold night…

I stare up at the sky, admiring the moon for one last time before the water dances over me.

I took that step for you, Matt…